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Now that your desires are clearly laid out on paper, you can pick a place that will satisfy both your needs. —Paul Dobransky, MD, author of The Secret Psychology of How We Fall in Love7.

Be More Positive Than Negative There's a more effective way to air grievances than to file an angry complaint.

Beginning a relationship is generally the easy part; it's maintaining the connection that gets a little tricky.

That's why a growing number of twosomes (whether or not they've tied the knot) are going into couples therapy as a preemptive strike against the tough times that will inevitably hit..to learn how to keep the good times flowing.

That's why it's important for both of you to repeat each other: so you know you've been heard and you feel understood. Grow Your Tolerance Neither of you is perfect, and the quirks you both have are here to stay.

So rather than let those annoying traits work your last nerve, try to get in touch with the upside of those particular flaws, even if it's not immediately recognizable.

But simple acts like stroking his arm while you're watching TV, taking his hand when you're walking down the street, or fondling his thigh during dinner are also ways to bond.

—New York City psychotherapist Jo Ann Magdoff, Ph D 12.—Psychologist Diana Kirschner, Ph D, author of Opening Love's Door6.Find the Intersection When making decisions together, try to find common ground. Let's say you're angling for a vacay in San Francisco to see the sights and hit up the cool shops and restaurants, while he wants a tropical getaway where he can veg out by the pool and sip drinks with umbrellas in the glass.—Psychotherapist Barton Goldsmith, Ph D, author of Emotional Fitness for Couples3.Don't Be BFFs Being pals with your man is great in theory.I'm sure you can still be the fun guy I adore and also be on time." —Los Angeles psychologist Yvonne Thomas, Ph D 8.